The blue turns yellow.

Well, I certainly was feeling sorry for myself yesterday.  But today is another day with the possibility of one good thing happening to bring a smile or a sliver of joy.  Its funny but I gave up most of the control of my life a long time ago but recently I feel that this roller coaster has no end and I am in an amusement park of wild rides and trickster hucksters. 

I need a full time job with benefits.  I don't need a lot of money just enough to pay bills and the occasional splurge.  I am willing to work hard and to the fullest of my capacity.  The journey I am on needs me to be independent of anyone else financially.  Those who know what is going on are shaking their head at my dilemma.  Those who don't know are shaking their heads at my foolish dialogue.  Why after all I am who I am.  Why should I need help from anyone to make anything happen.

Trying to break free from being married to Danny Brooks is not easy for me.  This has been my identity since I was seventeen.  Losing part of myself to the foolishness of life. 

Writing to write

It's been another day.  The darkness is developing in the cracks of time to engulf me with sadness.  I cried over my ice cream.  It went so quickly into a creamy broth that only brought tears to my eyes.  The welcome did not rise to make me feel warm with love.  I coveted the banana's smooth texture hoping to make a happiness in my mouth which might envelope me with a recognition of a time in which there were no great concerns over the future.  The certainity that time will be the friendliest of aquaintances to meet me each morning and kiss me on the forehead to wish me sweet dreams when I rest is gone and replaced with fear that I will crack into a million pieces and scatter into the oblivion of darkness.

Why you ask does this need to be written today.  I have screamed and fought with the ugliness today and it won this lap.  Hopefully tomorrow there will be a different outcome........

Random Picture and its Love

This is a picture taken of Buddy, my father-in-law, in 2006.  He is sitting in his den with his beloved dog, Trotter, and the remote control.  Trotter is a very protective dog.  This was probably taken while Danny was irritating him with an attempt to touch Buddy.  This picture was chosen randomly without seeing the image from a file containing pictures from our old hard drive that crashed.  The pictures were retrieved and are on my laptop now.

Buddy passed away last year.  He was one of the greatest male influences in my life.  If I ever needed help he was there for me.  Car break down, small plumbing problems, dog needs burying, he was the one who I called.  He loved his family and did everything he could to show his love.  I miss him so much.

At Sims the other day a friend of his who drank coffee and discussed politics shared some stories with me about his relationship with Buddy.  It brought tears to my eyes.  Every time someone brings him up I find myself fighting tears.  He was a constant every day presence in my life that has not been filled or forgotten.

I just hope that everyone has someone like him in their lives.

britht moon rising

This is a picture of the moon rising above the tree tops filtred through my toy camera app.  I love the rustiness of the picture.  The following is just a plane picture captured on my iphone.  It is amazing how dark it can be and how brightly the moon shines over the treetops.

I am looking for all the brightness I can find right now.  Working five or more hours six days a week is tiring in this heat.  I feel so frazzled and unable to make decisions regarding my life situation therefore it is is the same unchanged unhappiness day after day.  I know I have the ability to change this but I keep procrastinating and finding excuses to not make the telephone calls I need to make or do the paperwork that would start the process to end this free fall of an existence and become a whole person again.  I really need to figure out who I am.  I need a full time job with benefits.  I need to know where I am going to live and how much I need to down size this gargantuan life that is becoming a hoarder's dream.

Oh, how I hate the whine that I have written to be read by any passing witness.  Part of my unhappiness is feeling I am lying to most of the people I know about my life.  But the person who is responsible for  telling their story is not letting the story be known.  Too cryptic?  Then don't read further postings until the sun shines brightly but without the burning heat of the parched desert and rains bring an oasis to the land.

Feathers of the morning

Found my first Cardinal feather this morning.  There are always lots of  crow, dove and assorted gray feathers.  I also find the occasional blue jay feather with its beautiful blue sheen but the red of the Cardinal has not been dropped.

The family is always afraid the cat is going to get a bird when it comes to the bird bath or feeder.  I don't think  the cat is stealthy or quick enough to get the birds.  They need to be on the look out for the hawk that sometimes swoops into the yard and scatters the littler birds to the safety of the trees.

I found these feathers when I was watering this morning.  One of the perks of the morning.

The phone

I hate to talk on the phone.  I hate to make phone calls.  I would rather get in my car and drive to where a person is and talk to them than call and try to communicate over the phone.  I procrastinate calling everyone.  I love texting and e-mail.  No pretense of I'm okay, how are you, life is so great bullshit.  Just words written where I can read them at my will and think of a response without the hesitation in a conversation that so worries me that I will babble about anything.  Now, I know that everyone I talk to on the phone is going to think badly of me.  This posting is not directed toward you and our phone conversations.  Relax.  I am genuine with you but I still hate calling you.  I'm sorry but I am trying to face some of the cold hard facts of my life that have produced the me I am today.  The phone thing is one of them. 

Calling the doctor's office is the worst phone call.  I only call when I know I need to make an appointment and need to see the doctor pretty quickly.  Trying to be truthful but still giving a sense of emergency so that I will actually get to see my doctor on a day that works for me is excruciatingly painful.  Almost as bad as whatever ailment is causing me to make the phone call.

Talking to my mother over the phone is also on the list of really don't want to do.  I love her but hate to talk on the phone with her.  I am calling usually to tell her that I am coming over or making plans to do something with her later in the week.  The small bits of trivial information that I have to maneuver are like land mines ready to make me be angry.  Yeah, there are a lot of anger issues with me and my family and when my Mom starts in on the family gossip I cannot help myself but respond with honest feelings about what ever may have happened.  I feel trapped.

Phone calls should be like they were in the olden days when people counted pennies and phones were a luxury.  Short and sweet like a text.  The information exchange with the smallest amount of social pleasantries.  Although I do get texts from one persona who seems to always find the least amount of characters to send stupid messages of fake support.  Or we could start writing letters that go through the United States Postal Service.  When you read old letters you think of the care the author took in composing them with just the right sentiment.

Just another thought for another day.

Sunday morning coming down

No one else but the dog and cat to share the house this morning.  Too bad I will have to leave soon to pick up my mother and run her errands and buy her groceries.  She needs some craft items to help occupy the time she spends all alone with her dogs.  I am terrified of becoming my mother and I mean it.  It is not a joke about becoming old.  It is the truth about her older years.  I do not want them.  My children and friends try to reassure me that it will not happen but how can they know.  We share a lot of genes.  True my addiction habits do not cause me to isolate like hers have.  I do like my downtime and I do not suffer idiots well but I also love exchanging ideas and discussing everything under the sun.  These are hard to do by yourself.   

Growing older is going to happen unless I die which is always a possibility given the stress I am allowing myself to live under right now.  I do not feel like 54.  Yes, I am behind on a lot of teen stuff but I am open to new music and movies. I did refuse to become a Twilight groupie although I did read the series.  I am opposed to Harry Potter not because of the wizardry and magic but because of the masses of adoring fans.  By the way there are a lot of classic movies I never watched for the same reason.  Titanic anyone?

Yeah, I know the thing is graphic novels and movies made from them.  I loved Sucker Punch!  I really need to get in  on at least one flash mob or at the very least observe one.  See lots of things to be done that are not for the middle aged.

I have an iphone but not an ipad.  I download my music, not buying cd's.  I do not go to the boxstore to rent movies (I get them at the library for free!).  My laptop is favorited with facebook, I tweet, I try new apps all the time.  I only play games on the phone.  I watch some of my favorite shows on my laptop.  I am not tied down to a box for my entertainment.  I never look for a phone book or a map.  I'm not a dinosaur.  But I do have preferences that come from my generation.  I love wearing jeans and hate that I now work where I have to dress business casual.  No makeup is my personal way to travel but to work means to try and look younger and that means makeup.  

Enough musing for the morning.  Off to crazy land.

Forgetting something?

I have the feeling all the time that I am forgetting something important.  That there is something peeking around the corner that needs attention.  Certainly not all that art stuff that has so encompassed my time.  Not my family that is fractured.  Not my house which needs paint, flooring, landscaping and electrical attention.  Not my friends that I neglectfully do not call to make dinner, lunch or creative dates.  Not my work life that has me doing minimum wage employment.  Oh, maybe it's that until I get my shit together nothing is going to happen to cause me to be happier than I am right now which is zilch. 

Ramblings of change

I haven't posted in a long time because everything changed and I need a new direction.  The previous title of this blog was a direct reason everything had to change.  Come on who would label their life as dusty and rusty but someone who had stopped trying.  I thought I was clever because I loved old rusty bits of metal and wood.  Long discarded items I found in garages of estate sales.  But then I brought these things into my life and added to the clutter of my life.  Sure some of this stuff is lucky enough to be placed into artwork and to be shown to the world but lets face facts I have become a hoarder of the art junk.  This is a direct affectation of how I have been living. 

Big changes need reflection to make sure you are going in the right direction.  But I have to admit that the heat is making it a challenge to do anything.  Working out of the home is also not making it easy.  I love interacting with so many people every day but it drains my emotional and physical self to a puddle of mush.  I come home to the heat and I want to sleep and then its time to go to bed to get ready to go to work the next day.  Oh yeah, falling and messing up my arm so that I need pain medication is not helping this situation. 

My life has been so gorgeous and I screwed it up.  I was lazy and didn't want to rock the boat.  I am where I am because of who I am.  This is recognizable as truth. 

This is how I want to do my 70's.  I need to start now being my true creative self.  I know I have made a start but now this first full day of my 54th year is the beginning of my new life.  Ringo was never the biggest star but he has continued to create and put his work out to the world.  I love his lyrics they speak to me about how to live.  He drummed differently.  I want to find my beat and be the me.

Happy Birthday Ringo. My wish for multitudes of  Peace and Love to all who read this post. 

A really bad attitude.

I am angry. 


There I have said it.  It is out in the open.  I don't think anyone is surprised.   My life is drastically changing and yes I was stupid to not to be prepared for the changes.  I lived in a fairytale.  A witch has darkened the sky and there is no house from Kansas to fall on her.  There is no Prince, only a frog.   I will not be able to name the imp.  No woodsman is in the forest.  Damn it my hair is not growing fast enough.


I will be okay.  Some day.  But not today.  Today I am angry.

Can a camera make me happy?

I have had issues with taking iphone photos and then having the photos turned sideways.  Although I like the look of this one as it appears in this photo.  I have decided to buy myself a digital camera for my birthday.  I need to decide if I want more zoom potential or micro ability.  The ability to take great photos of the art and send them to art competitions, galleries, festivals is my biggest need.  My iphone is great for inspiration and i love having the apps to play with but I need clear, sharp, true color photos.  Any suggestions?

My creative process has been a little stunted lately so I feel good about just having anything to show. behind the bluebird was a bad idea.  The board should have been blue and the wax background in the tin should have been brown.  This would have made the bird and the music nest pop.  I may try to remove the bird and see if I can make that happen.

Writing about the bluebird makes me think of happiness and how it is missing from my life right now.  I am not depressed just sad most of the time.  I do make myself find small moments of joy each day and be thankful for those gifts.  My sweet dog in my lap.  A hug from my son.  Laughter in the midst of chaos.  Color combinations of my fellow workers attire.  Like I said small but needed.

I have made an application for a small local juried art festival.  I hate that I want to check my email every other hour to see if there is a response.  The festival is fairly soon and I need to make some work!  I know that if I am denied it will be stunting to my process but then so is every aspect of life right now.

When I started making art it was only for myself and then I started to share with my friends in our group, then my family, then my community, then other art groups, then a larger community.  I understand it is a process.  I create for myself but right now it would be nice to make some money off this creativity.  I hate writing that sentence but it is true.  If I can come out even on materials and sales I will be so happy. 

Long time no posting.

I call this piece the nucleus of destruction.  I used journal pages that were torn and burnt to make the craters.  I have been going through a rough time personally and it seems to be affecting the work.  I wish it was causing me to create and purge with a passion, instead it seems to make me dribble my emotions onto the boards in ineffective patterns.  Hopefully by beginning to at least post something it will open the door again.

whats under the surface

love the blue in this piece so much that i cannot go to the next phase of creation.  it is leaning against my hutch in the dining room.  it has been there for three days.  i touch the waxy surface as i walk by.  afraid that the next thing i do may be the undoing of the calm. 

i have however been able to work on this piece this past weekend.  it started as this

progressed to this:

and now sits in the workspace looking like this:

it still hase some work to be done but i know how to get it where i want it to be.  hope its title will appear as it is completed.

not to wax too poetic but isn't life like creating art.  we start with fresh clean surfaces and start piling on the paint, wax, etc.  sometimes it is crap and sometimes beauty.  sometimes there is beauty under the crap and sometimes there is crap under the beauty.

WIP

 Working part time at the Library has really cut down on my art time.  My days off have been busy with home life.  I am working on my timing for housework, cooking, yardwork, library and art.  I guess they list pretty much says how I prioritize.  The above piece is a work in process.  Not much to see now but after a few more layers of wax and other things it should become what it needs to be

Got carried away with the graphite on this piece.  But I really like the bones and can't wait to work more with the wax.

I am going to try and post more work in process as I go.  There is something about photographing work that can change the perspective and values.

Gotta go to work for the paycheck for now.

Small moments in the work area.

 I thought I would share random pictures I shot in my work area in the old garage.  I started working in this area when I was moving my art supplies out of what is supposed to be the spare bedroom.  The problem is I can't quite get everything out of the bedroom because I am having problems with sorting and deciding what to purge and what to save.  I admit I have too much stuff!!!!!

I like the silver tongs holding the egg.  I had envisioned it on the tray with words but it just hasn't bloomed into anything but this. I wonder if anyone can guess the words I thought of when I was formulating this concept?

Don't know why this picture is upside down.  I love this old hymnal.  The worn red cover.  The binding is totally gone and the paper is very, very, fragile and some pages just tear when you turn them.

 My trusty drill and various drill bits.  Don't you love using a paddle bit and watching the sawdust churn up out of the hole.  It is very satisfying.  I thing I could drill holes all day.  Hmmm...  Maybe I need to do just that.

 This poor baby doll was one of my garage sale buys.  The head was used on the rust brothers.  Not sure what to do with the limbs.

Another picture that turned upside down.  A cup of rusted nails with an old pill bottle of assorted small items.  Always a good idea to have rusty nails on the standby.

This silk blossom found a home in the masking tape.  It may think its safe from the torch.  And I finally found my small magnifying glass.  I wondered where that went.  I've been looking at my house with the focused eye of a flashlight like they do on the CSI programs. 

And lastly my brushes.  I had someone joke about the number of brushes I have accumulated.  I buy cheap and I buy garage sale, estate sale art supplies.  I work hard with my materials.  I do make an effort to clean them when I work but there are occasional interruptions that leave brushes in water for days or the forgotten brush that dries with encrusted paint or other medium.  

Sadly, none of these items will be touched this morning.  I have promised to go to my mothers and help clean out her garage.  She has a junk man coming to pick up junk and furniture that she left behind when she rented her house that have turned to rust and kindling.

Enjoying the morning!

 I have been quite lazy this morning.  Sitting on the patio after deadheading the flowers I was overjoyed at the beauty of small moments.  The cool breeze.  My dog napping on the patio.  The birds eating the sunflowers under the trees.  A squirrel scooting across the deck.  The cat watching it all from under a chair.  Oh, I loved it!!!!! 

I didn't take pictures of the animals but I did decide to play with the filters on my iphone and snapped a few random shots of the flowers.

 I love the almost acid trip feeling of the daisys.  I bought them at clearance and don't know what their true name is but the pink and orange have become the main colors of the containers this year.

I love how the zinnias become a little ragged and forlorn but still oh so beautiful.  I weathered this photo and may make a card out of this image.   One of my favorites of the morning.

I hope you find some beauty and joy in your day!

The Rust Brothers or La Ruggine Fratelli

We won third place in the 3-D division of the Fourth Annual VACH art show this past weekend.  The brothers are a bit shiny in this picture.  I toned that shine down with another wash of paint before they went visiting.  They are an interesting duo with their found object arms linked in solidarity against a cruel word.  Their hats hint at the jocularity they embrace when no one else is around.  The big brother stands firmly while the younger is ready to move away from the harsh words of judges.  I really like the brothers.

The part time job is exhausting right now.  Learning new software, the feeling of being judged by every person who has worked there for years and knows the job and each other.  The job is so lovely.  I love it and I am sure I will settle in and it won't be so tiring.  In the meantime my home suffers the lack the care because I have been to tired when I am home and lets not even discuss the sadness of my dog.  She misses me and is moping around with her tail down.  Watching for signs of my leaving.  I think she misses me or maybe she just misses the meal that she would get if I were home? 

Hope you are able to enjoy the spring storms without too much stress.  I love lightening and the roar of thunder.  Don't get blown away!

Yeah, peace baby!

After chatting with my husband on the way home from a local art show, I realized how negative I was about the experience and how much I missed by not looking at the event as a fun excuse to chat with fellow artists.  There are a lot of things I could say in my defense but they would all be excuses for poor behavior.  I do congratulate all the winners and am so happy for the quality of art that was shared.  I am so fortunate to know so many creative individuals who are willing to share their process and techniques.

I also want to thank all the individuals who helped make the show possible, our hardworking President who took vacation days, the ladies who gave their day to receive the art, the guy and girls who put up screens and hung art and the individuals who made a wonderful reception with delicious food.  It takes a village to put an art show together and we have hardworking artists who put aside their creativity to do the hard mental work of making this thing happen.  I also want to thank the spouses of all these people who encourage and support their artistic partners.  Thanks Again!!

Inspriration

Have been asked to do a display in a neighboring community's city hall  in October.  I have been taking some photos to get the creative juices flowing for new work.  Really love this one of the concrete in my driveay with the shadow.  I think this would be cool to attemp with encaustic.

I also like this one of the patina/stains in my fire dish.  Needs tweeking to accomplish in encaustic but there is something there that I would like to emulate.

Nature is always a good inspiration.  I love the blue peeking through the foliage and the brown tree limbs.  I am trying to be proactive in taking pictures of my surroundings.  They are not always great photos but they sometimes have elements that I would like to use in my art.  Now there are a lot that need to be deleted.  Nothing to see just move along bad.

As a side note to my personal life:  I am now a part-time Library Clerk at the Zula Bryant Wylie Library in Cedar Hill.  I am working mostly in the evening late in the week and on Saturday.  Come by and see me and check out a book.  This is a big change but I think its going to be so beneficial to my life in so many ways.  Learning new things and meeting a lot of people.  Now if I can just get my boss to quit using a suffix in front of my name I will happy!!!

Brothers

This is a picture of the brotheres as they wait to get their bodies assembled before they can live a joyous life.  I could hear them calling out to me to hurry up and get that creative glint in my eye that I needed to pull this bit from here and this bit from here to allow their bodies to take shape.  Power tools have been involved in their assemblage along with glues, stains and all sorts of chemicals.  They area going to make their formal introduction to the world at the VACH 4th Annual Art Show next weekend at the Rec Center.  If you are curious about the brothers please come and visit with them in Cedar Hill.  Who knows where life may take them?

Good Morning, Good Morning!!!

I woke up this morning to the sound of Debbie Reynolds singing "Good Morning" from "Singing in the Rain".  I then proceeded to have a song lyric pop into my head regarding every thought I had until I just had to jump out of bed and get my thinking right.  Don't get me wrong I love music but when you think about if its going to be a sunny day and you hear it as "Johnny Nash" singing "Bright Sunshiny Day", you get sidetracked in the feeling of the song and those lyrics about seeing all obstacles in your way lead to you thinking of all the tasks you must accomplish in the next fourteen hours and suddenly you start hearing Dido singing "Do You Have a Little Time", well you know its time to get up out of bed and out of your mind and into the physical world of where are my shoes, its a little chilly this morning and yes to the dog who wants to be fed and taken outside.  (By the way I know the above sentence is too long and runs on and on but I just wanted to give a taste of my mental side this morning.)

I have to acknowledge my friends for song lyrics popping into my head constantly.  We play this game called the "Glass Bead Game" from a book by Hesse.  It is in simplified terms just an open stream of conscienceness withing a group of people who respond to statements from others without censorship.  Now even when we don't actually start a game we still respond to each other with these connected thoughts with a lot of trivial knkowledge of tv, movie, song, book and sports knowledge.    There is also a lot of breaking into song.  I think this is one of the reasons it is hard for some people to feel comfortable when they are introduced to the group.  I love my friends. 

Now I am going to leave with lyrics.

Happy Trails to you!

Springing Forward

It is so confusing in my house when we spring forward into Daylight Savings Time.  Some clocks make the leap by themselves and some are just stubborn and must be pushed into getting rid of that hour.  The winding clocks can be changed easier in spring than fall when you have to wait for them to wind down and stop for an hour.  I am not complaining just musing.  I love that it will be light later in the evening.  It will make it easier for me and the dog to stay up just a little later.

We don't have lambs this spring.  There are not rams in the pasture.  I miss the bouncing lambs playing with each other.  I don't miss worrying about the weak ones or the ones who die at birth.  Country living can be hard on the emotional well being of soft hearted individuals.

The reception was fantastic Friday evening.  It was so much fun.  My friends are great!!!!  I set a record for pieces of art sold during a reception.  I may also have a large commissioned piece in the works.  Details to be worked out for size and color scheme which will make it harder because I really like working intuitively but it is for a friend so I will give it a try.

My friend Dragonheart had a bad day Friday but she didn't tell me until yesterday.  I love her and wish her some happiness.  We spent the day together and went to Friday Flings an art and craft fair at the Will Rogers Center in Fort Worth.  It was wonderful and all the vendors were so nice.  Sharing their wealth of goods and how to's.  Bought a bracelet and a necklace because they were so much fun.  Didn't take pictures so can't share the bounty.

We also shopped at the flea market in the cattle barn.  It was like a small Canton.  Bought a few bottles and things I must have really needed because I love them! 

Today is my sister-in-laws birthday celebration.  I am looking forward to lunch at Campisi's.  One of my favorite restaurants in Dallas. 

So all in all a great introduction to Spring.  Can't wait to see what is going to happen this year!

Trying to find a plan with Michael

I dreamt I was on roller skates last night.  This was after I was an assistant to a professor and I disrupted a student that had been allowed to give racist rant.  A mother of a student needed a ride home instead of taking the bus and I volunteered to pick her up at the bus stop.  I skated off the curb and around a parking lot.  I was surprised in my dream that I did so well.  I busted my tailbone rather badly during one of my last forays on skates.  I'm still working on the walking without falling thing so putting on wheels is a major fall waiting to happen.  Did my dream have anything to do with all the living that I a doing.  It must.  Oh, by the way, they were old school four wheel skates not the super cool modern in line.

My dream also made me think of the video my kids called "Sunset Sam"  although its true name is "Cruisin".  Michael Nesmith is a genius.  His video "Elephant Parts" was true musical wonderment with a lot of comical skits thrown around.  Can I get an "Ayrrrrrr!!!!"  We watched this over and over.  My kids and I still quote lines to each other.  He made Pirates cool in the '80s. 

Michael is also a Dallas kid.  His mother worked and developed Liquid Paper from her Dallas garage.  He then became famous as a Monkey.  I loved, loved, loved that show.  I was a young teenager when it was on  for the first time.  My Dad would not let us watch so we loved when he was gone and my Mom watched it with us.  When they went into syndication it was heaven.  Back in the day it was Davey or Mickey as the cool heartthrob with Peter as the addled clown and Michael as the smart one.  You were never supposed to swoon over smarts only beauty.  I guess it's still that way.

Anyway, enough rambling over dreams and icons.  Back to work!!!!

Dancing my life away.

I feel like this ballerina this morning.  Dancing in place at will of those around me.  I know this is a little exaggerated and others would deny my perception.  Some would say I do exactly as I want to and when I want to.  I am not a selfish person.  I do care about others. Details would only cloud the issue so you will not be getting juicy tidbits of my personal life.  This blog is supposed to deal with artistic adventures spiced with my reflections of reality.  Ha, there's the rub.  I don't think like other people.  Never have.  I have learned this through multiple conversations with friends, strangers and all those who fall in between.

I am on the brink of the next big change in my life.  And I find myself teetering on the edge and not wanting to take the plunge to the other side.  Fear and selfishness are preventing the leap.   It gets a little more difficult with age to make the decisions become facts.  Things will happen as they always do and I will continue my path called life.  There will be happy moments surrounded by sadness, grief, anger, angst and anxiety but I will continue until it is time to step off the music box and make the biggest change of all.

Celebrate Good Times, Come On!!!!

Come see this piece in person at the Visual Expressions Art  Gallery in Cedar Hill.  They are throwing me a reception on Friday, March 11th, 7-9 pm.  I would love for you to come and drink a glass of wine and slowly let the madness of your week leach away and leave you calm for the weekend.  This piece represents the need to continue forward and not fall away by going back to where you've been.  Hope to see you soon!

Blue Thursday?

I have been so busy trying to create work for the reception at Visual Expressions Art Gallery.  They have blank walls and need some bigger art to fill the space.  Going big with wax is harder than I thought.  It takes a lot of wax to cover those boards.

I would rather be making these small mobil gardens.  I love the rusty tins, wooden casters and cast off wood.  As you can see in the previous picture, rust seems to creep into a lot of art.

I filled this one with robin egg blue wax.  Really love how the texture of the tin is part of the center.

Or I could be pulling all the blue glass out of my cabinets and putting it on the mantle.

I am in fascination with all things blue right now.  It is showing up in a lot of my work and home decor.  Its forunate that I have picked up so many things from sales that I don't feel the need to shop to satisfy my blues.

Hope you are not feeling the blues but joyously living the blues!!!

It doesn't add up?

This piece is currently being scrutinized for what went wrong.  I love the individual parts but not the sum of the whole.  The colors are so much better in person and you can really see the shine of the wax.  The picture  was taken on the cuff in my work area.  I was hoping to be able to see and figure out what to do to make me like this piece.  I already have so many that I  don't like that i hate to add to the pile.  After several more days of sitting I will probably quickly do something that will either help or be destructive.  Don't get me wrong.  I want it to work  but I do love melting the was whatever the outcome and as I tell my students you can always scrape it off.  Costly but possible solution.

Now I do love this piece but probably not this orientation.  One of the laments of abstract artists.  The picture does not capture the lovely pale cream slightly yellow of this work.  This is one of the small pieces, 12"x12" that I made to help with the creative flow.  I think this one is staying home because of the small piece of peace I feel when I look at it.  It is already framed in a simple black outline.  I can turn and change its perspective as often as I wish.

I also did some citra solve papers that are drying.  Hopefully I will be able to share tomorrow.  I became a member of the "Love Mixed Media" group and they had a technique section which discussed these.  I tried the process several years ago and never did anything with the paper.  The stuff was still in my cabinet and I decided to use it up.  I had space on the table so I loaded up the magazine and am letting it cook away. 

The weather turned cooler.  I am so happy with a cool morning.  I really don't want to turn on the a/c in February.  The always wishing for the opposite of what we are given is so human and I definitely am terribly human.  Listening yesterday to Dr. Maya Angelou on NPR radio was so enlightening as to the human condition and how as humans we are all more alike than we are alien to each other.  I learn so much during Black History Month. 

Well, I have to do some housework so there is time to play later.  Hope you get to play also!!!!

Le petite jardin mobile.

I spent a lot of time working on art and this was my greatest accomplishment this week.  I created a small rusted garden on wheels.  The wooden base is a scrap piece of wood from the garage. It may have come from one of the rent house remodels.  I did have to cut to length.  Love the power tools.  The little tart tins were aged and rusted by me but they were purchased at estate sales.  I also used nails bought from estate sales.  I love the rusted metal casters.  They are operational and have to be positioned to balance the weight in order for the garden to stay upright.  The red in the center of the flowers is encaustic wax.  I may try other versions of this with blue. 

These are not the best pictures.  I am still shopping for a new camera.  My poor coffee table shows wear but I love it.  It is a cut down kitchen table so it is large.  As the name of my blog says I live a dusty rusty life and don't worry about the scratches on my furniture. 

I still need to create the larger hanging pieces I need for the upcoming reception.  The boards are made and ready to be worked.  Dealing with stage fright is not pleasant.  Using large amounts of wax is daunting.  Using small pieces to loosen up and allow the creativity to flow. 

Crazy wax sculpting video.

It takes a lot of courage to use this much wax in such an innovative way.  Thinking of taking the wax into a more 3-dimensional area.  It is amazing how the wax hardens and becomes substantial with time.  Small scapings and waxed papers are as far as I've gotten.  I have also been working with a freestanding substrate.  Will post pictures as soon as I have something to share.

On a personal note:  The gallery where I do workshops and have art has decided to celebrate me with a reception on Friday, March 11.  I am busy working to have new art to display and be worthy of the main wall .  New boards are being made that are bigger than my normal work.  The leap to big with wax is a huge task.  I need a larger clear work surface.  I knocked over a pot of red wax and was busy scraping wax off the desk for twenty minutes.

The act of creating is a little harder while I am dealing with this "skin treatment".  My dermatologist has me on a topical skin ointment to treat the pre-cancer spots on my face and arms.  It has me looking like my face is covered with herpes.  It is not pretty and it is very uncomfortable.   Just saying that this week is the worse but it is supposed to be better and better.  Just saying that there is a certain level of frustration that I think is hampering creativity.

To Valentines or not to Valentines?

I have very mixed emotions about Valentines Day.  The very commercialization of the day makes me cringe, but I have to realize that my generation had a whole lot to do with that.  Also the cheap decorations from China.  The beauty of love makes you want to celebrate the day with everyone, your spouse, your family, your friends, your neighbors, your community, your city, your state, your country.  Spread the love, right?

The old fashioned valentines are my favorites.  Vintage sweetness.  I also love the altered anything with a heart thrown on it.  The cold and snow have me playing with scraps and I came up with these three hearts.  Still trying to use up what I have on hand so sometimes I would think of the perfect thing but I didn't have it so I looked for what I liked and these are what I came up. 

This last one is my favorite although the picture shows the red as orange.  I am still taking pictures with my iphone and these were taken in the workspace under awful lighting on the desktop.  The message of using scrap felt, material, thread, buttons, crocheted pieces and charms comes through.  The hearts are about four to six inches across.  Not big, not tiny.  Just right for a little love.